Making a connection is hard.
- Today is my day off and here I am enjoying myself, drinking my coffee, sketching, drawing and farting under the blankets and giggling by myself.
- Constantly when Im by myself I think about how hard it is to try and make a friend - in all honesty I feel like every time I start a conversation with anyone Im afraid to make it uncomfortable for the other person, its a weird feeling I have constantly every time I look someone in the eye, maybe Im the one that gets uncomfortable with myself.
- I have a hard time trying to keep a conversation or try to engage in a large group of people, Im afraid I will sound stupid maybe even empty so I just rather enjoy everyone else opinions and jokes and thanks to this I feel people just stop trying to get to know me because I don't give anything back.
- Does this come with age? or just loneliness in general, when you are by yourself all the time and you learn how to survive on your own - maybe Im in a comfort zone and I don't want to take any risks, Im too tired to try hard but at the same time I get to meet this amazing people that I wish I could be part of their world and share a connection.
- My days off are getting to real! Im going back to my art, I'll find comfort in my coffee Im sure.